Argentina needs to Admit that they don’t know how to play Soccer

Yeah, this article is sure to incite some fury, but that’s the whole point. I’m writing about the Peru vs Argentina game that happened about two weeks ago, and frankly, I’m still pissed off about it. You see, that game encapsulates everything that drives me crazy about soccer.

First of all, let me just state that I ENJOY soccer. Although I didn’t have the least interest in the sport when I first came to Peru, you can’t live in South America for 10 years without acquiring some kind of appreciation for the game (besides, there are weekends where there is no American Football, or basketball on and you have to watch SOME kind of sport!).

Let me tell you this, a good soccer game can be super entertaining. Contrary to popular belief, it’s a ROUGH game. Those people push each other about HARD, and they aren’t wearing any protection (as in other sports which shall go unnamed).

The other thing that’s great about soccer is that the rules are so basic that basically any country anywhere in the world can learn how to play it, thus providing a common ground for international competition.


This simplicity of the rules can cause some problems, especially when you play with a bunch of Picon assholes like Argentina…IN Argentina.

As you will note in the above picture, the score is 1 to 1 and the time is over 90 minutes even though the game is only supposed to last for 90 minutes. Why are they playing for extra minutes you ask? Well, in the bullshit rules of soccer, there isn’t an official play clock. They play for 90 minutes, and then the refs just let them continue playing for a while until they decide the game is over. This is because the clock just keeps running when they go out of bounds or whatever, and the refs give a little extra time to make up for this. IT’S FUCKING STUPID! Why? Because what happens is that when you’re playing in Argentina and Argentina is either tied or behind, the refs just let the game continue until Argentina scores the go ahead goal.


If your team is so damned good, why not have hardset RULES that apply to EVERYBODY? This wishy-washy play it by ear shit pisses me off?


Because in this Peru vs Argentina game that I keep referencing, Argentina eventually did score the go ahead goal at about 94 minutes on a play that was CLEARLY OFFSIDES (and Offsides is the most ridiculous rule in all of sports…just because your team is playing bad defense doesn’t mean they should get their ass saved by a penalty…but while the rule is there it should be ENFORCED! But it’s NOT enforced against Argentina so it’s BULLSHIT).

This Peru vs Argentina game also boasted a Argentinian player touching the ball with his hand that was conveniently not called, and it was torrential rain that should have led to a suspension of play (not done).

Most of the time when people bitch about the refs it’s just sour grapes, but not when Argentina is involved (or Brazil either for that matter…come to think of it, you know who else are a bunch of flop artists? The Italians!). Anyway, I wish these soccer teams would just man up and PLAY and not sit their and bitch and cheat to steal their precious (and thus rendered meaningless) wins.

Argentina/Peru was a joke, if they had followed the rules it would have ended up Peru 2 Argenina 1 and Maladroga (the heroic Argentininan ex-player current terrible coach) would be sitting at home with a head full of coke, crying and watching Ghana win the whole damn thing. Whoever’s in charge of world Soccer needs to sit down and make a couple reasonable rule changes so the game is not so easilly suseptible to corruption. It would only take about five minutes…god stuff like this drives me crazy!

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1 Comment

  1. Anonymous

    Thanks Tom for the youtube video.. That was great for a good laugh 🙂 I agree with Ben the offside rule is stupid but it is right up there with several of hockey's stupid rules like the two line pass rule, icing or the puck has to enter the blue line before any offensive players can go in before it gets whistled. And I never could understand why soccr could not just have a big Time clock for all to see like in any other sport and instead of adding some random amount of time at the end of the game for injury time just stopand start the clock like in any other normal sport.


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