US Movie Rating System Not as Good as Peru’s

I often talk on this web page how freedom of expression is a lot more fully embraced in a country like Peru (cheap flights to Peru) than it is in the self-titled bastion of freedom known as the US.  A good example of this is the ridiculous US movie rating system.  If any of you are curious, you should check out the documentary “This Film is Not Yet Rated” to see what kind of gestapo censorship actually goes on in the US.  My friends from other parts of the world can’t understand US television.  People have said it so many times that it becomes cliche, but on US tv you’ll see the most gruesome killings and torture that you can imagine, but not one breast for example (plenty of breasts on TV in other parts of the world…and a LOT fewer school shootings…COINCIDENCE!!!!).

On Peruvian TV, just regular TV, you’ll see just about any movie ever invented in its entirety.  They don’t believe in censorship in Peru like they do in the US.  People always dismiss me as ridiculous when I get on this particular soap box, but it pisses me off that Americans will so casually bleep out words and scenes in a film and then turn around and say they love “freedom.”  It’s frankly B@#@%!!$t!!!
For an idea of how truly weird the US rating system is, just take a look at their poster to explain the rating system.  It’s just FILLED with bizarre imagery, but it’s the type of thing people will only give a cursory glance too and then wander off without saying anything further.  Seriously, I believe Americans are ultra-conditioned sheep.  There should be a frickin’ PROTEST about this rating system (you just haven’t thought about it, that’s why you’re disagreeing with me).
Let’s go through it panel by panel.  In the first panel, pictured above, you see a “G” movie.  The cartoons show who the film is appropriate for.  The images include, a man with a creepy grin and a woman with VERY large breasts in a form fitting shirt; a guy in a purple hat who is going to the movie with a rabbit (endorsement of bestiality?); a kid who doesn’t look very happy who is forced into going to the film with a very tall, erect, giraffe (pedophilia?); I don’t know what the kid with the big sunglasses and the shirt with the red dot is supposed to represent…but he’s suspicious (endorsement of communism?); and an unhappy white girl and black guy (they’re probably mad because their parents don’t support interracial dating).
That’s a whole BUFFET of controversy and that’s the “G” rating…the LEAST controversial!!!!
Let’s see what happens when the movie becomes “PG”
“PG” means “Parental Guidance.”  It also means that the wife’s shirt stays super tight and she sexistly covers her GIRL’S eyes but not her BOY’S (the rabbit gets to see everything).  Also invited is your crazy blue haired old aunt that nobody wants to hang around with, and a guy dressed all in pink with a boom box…yeah, bringing boom boxes to the movies is encouraged by the US movie rating system.  Things only get weirder as we move further down:
The “PG-13” rating means that it’s still “PG” but children have to be at least 13.  This rating was created specifically for “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” in which Spielberg insisted on putting in a scene in which a guy got his heart ripped out.  The fact that the ratings board is quite happy to just make up a new category at the convenience of a prestigious director, just shows how dedicated they are to their principles.
Oddly, the wife comes with a less form-fitting dress to “PG-13″ but the creepy dad is just as happy, probably because he finally has a chance to grope his little boy (although he only covers one eye…whatever that means…”one-eyed warrior…”).  Also invited is a super creepy kid in a bow-tie…what?  And why the hell are they covering the eyes of the RABBIT.  That’s PARENTAL guidance, does the motion picture association of america want to imply that child is that animal’s PARENT?  That’s just sick!
Oh…My…God…well, “R” stands for restricted, so who goes and sees these films?  Well the husband and wife are there…but even though the film is restricted, the wife has finally decided to dress like something other than a 2 dollar whore.  The husband doesn’t have any kids to grope, but he’s making up for it by driving his fingers DEEP down into his pockets.
Also going are some high school jock who is super pumped about going to a Restricted film, and a girl who looks really nervous about it.  Then…what’s the deal with the cougar in orange on the right and the young boy with thick glasses.  HE shouldn’t be going to this film!  And she’s holding him a little too close for MY liking!
It’s all truly disturbing…but just wait for the final panel: NC-17!
No one 17 and under admitted…which means that this is in all likelihood a pornographic film.  Maybe it would have made sense for the husband to go to this WITHOUT his wife…but as it is, he still has his hands DEEP in his pocket.  In addition to them, there’s some creepy younger guy with hands in BOTH his pockets SUPER-PSYCHED to spend a couple hours alone in the dark with some pornography…and, inexplicably, the frickin’ rabbit is BACK!  Here’s a character who was getting his eyes covered at “PG-13” but who has somehow managed to sneak into the theater to watch some porn.
Seriously, I don’t know what all these images are supposed to convey, but this poster just creeps me out.  Something needs to be done about the motion picture association of America…abusing cartoon animals like this just doesn’t cut it.
I rate this poster “NC-A” which stands for “Not to be seen by ANYONE!”
Good luck watching film in the US!  It’s a minefield!  Like I said before, you’re better off in Peru (American Airlines Flights)!

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1 Comment

  1. Anonymous

    interesting the progressive deemphasis of the woman´s boobs. The illustrator had a keen sense of humor, no doubt.

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